Patchy's Blog

Quarantine Thoughts from a Zombie

So there’s a virus. You’ve probably already heard that part. Everyone is being told to stay in their homes.

WELP!!!! Staying at home is NOTHING NEW for zombies… most people freak out if they see a zombie and jam a knife in our head or something…

Except now everybody is supposed to wear masks, and when a zombie wears a mask it’s hard to tell that it’s a zombie…

Hmmmm…. Patchy needs to put a mask on before going to Twitter!!!!!

Patchy is practicing social distancing!!!!!

Stay safe everyone!!!

The New TV Season is HERE!!!!

Okay, so the new season started a couple of months ago, but every time Patchy blogs about a TV show, it seems like that TV show ends up getting canceled or moved or the ratings stink… so Patchy’s been too depressed to blog.

So these are the shows Patchy is watching this season:

• The Good Doctor

• Empire

• New Amsterdam

• Stumptown

• Perfect Harmony

• American Housewife

• Fresh Off the Boat

• Magnum P.I.

• The Blacklist

• The Walking Dead

That seems like a pretty small list, but that’s all Patchy is watching at the moment… how about you? What TV shows are you watching this season?

Summertime Blues

It’s summertime. That means a lot of great TV shows aren’t showing any new episodes. SADNESS!!!! But there are a few great shows that Patchy and Patchette have watched this summer.

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GOTHAM HAS ENDED!!!! [SPOILERS]

This was made by Patchy’s Twitter friend @sapphiremoon01

A few hours ago, Patchy watched the last ever episode of Gotham. These are Patchy’s thoughts. WARNING… SPOILERS AHEAD…

When Patchy found out Gotham was ending after a shortened fifth season, Patchy didn’t think it would be very hard to say goodbye to the show. Gotham was crazy!!!! In a good way!!!! But after season 5, episode 11, they showed a preview for the final episode of the series and PATCHY STARTED CRYING… and over the next seven days, Patchy re-watched nearly every episode of the series… and cried some more… Patchy loves these characters, crazy as the show is.

Overall, Patchy was happy with the final episode. There was a ten-year time jump between the previous episode and the final episode, and they glossed over a lot. Patchy kinda knew going in that there was a time jump and that they couldn’t cover everything in one hour with commercial breaks, so it wouldn’t be an ideal perfect ending…

That said, they did a good job establishing the world after the jump, and they did it with one neat little trick — SUNSHINE!!!!! See, the sun never shines in Gotham. It’s always cloudy, gloomy, rainy. But after the time jump, we see the city bathed in sunlight. In the light of the sun, Gotham is BEAUTIFUL!!!!

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GOTHAM IS ENDING AND PATCHY IS SAD!!!!!

Gotham Title and Characters

Patchy is not ready to say goodbye to this show.

Patchy HATES goodbyes.

When Gotham first came on people made fun of the idea of a show about Batman that didn’t have Batman. Bruce Wayne was just a 12-year-old kid and the villains of Gotham were just ambitious bad guys… BUT… here’s the crazy thing… after five seasons, Gotham has become an odd fixture in Patchy’s TV watching life.

Gotham is dark but colorful, scary but funny, bleak but optimistic… it is all the things Patchy remembers from comic books. If you take it too seriously you miss the point!!!!

When Fox announced that this would be the last season of Gotham, Patchy didn’t think it would be so sad to say goodbye. THEN THEY SHOWED A PREVIEW FOR THE FINAL EPISODE AND PATCHY STARTED CRYING!!!!!

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PATCHY’S TV SHOWS UPDATE!!!!!

Patchy has not blogged in over six months. BAD PATCHY!!!!!! Patchette is always telling Patchy that he needs to blog!!!! So here’s Patchy blogging….

Of all the TV shows that got cancelled last summer… TWO OF THEM CAME BACK!!!!! Designated Survivor got picked up by Netty-Flixy!!!!! And NBC decided to give Timeless two more episodes to wrap up their cliffhanger!!!!!

Patchy needs to write a whole separate blog for Timeless… IT WILL HAVE SPOILERS!!!!

Anyway… the final season of Gotham is going and it’s been REALLY REALLY GOOD SO FAR!!!! Crazier than ever!!!!! Patchette refuses to watch it, though.

Patchy will try to blog again really soon, okay? BYE FOR NOW!!!!!!

HELP!!!! THEY CANCELLED ALL MY TV SHOWS THIS YEAR!!!!

This TV season has been BRUTAL!!!!! They’ve cancelled everything!!!! That’s what it feels like anyway.

  • Timeless – CANCELLED
  • Kevin Probably Saves the World – CANCELLED
  • Designated Survivor – CANCELLED
  • Gotham – RENEWED FOR FINAL SEASON

There’s probably more but Patchy would just get depressed thinking about it.

So… Patchy’s got Better Call Saul, The Orville, The Good Doctor, one more season of Gotham, and the Walking Dead shows… that’s about it. SADNESS!!!!!! Patchy needs more TV to watch and tweet!!!!!

Patchy is No Longer Shadowbanned… FOR NOW

Twitter responded to Patchy’s repeated requests for help and, as of right now, Patchy is NOT shadowbanned. Unless, of course, they changed the way they shadowban so that Patchy doesn’t know he’s shadowbanned.

Anyway… Patchy needs to blog more and watch TV less anyway…

The Shadowbanning of Patchy Has Gotten Ridiculous

Patchy is shadowbanned from Twitter again.

For those who don’t know what shadowbanning is, it’s when Twitter doesn’t want you using Twitter anymore even though you haven’t done anything wrong. Well, maybe you did something wrong but you didn’t violate their rules bad enough for them to ban you from using Twitter altogether. They say abusing hashtags is something that will result in a shadowban, except they don’t call it a shadowban. They just say they remove your tweets from everyone’s search results and notifications. THAT’S WHAT A SHADOWBAN IS!!!!! They make you invisible. The only time people see your tweets is if you happen to show up on their timeline.

For the past two weeks, Patchy has gotten shadowbanned while live tweeting Gotham on Thursday nights. Patchy doesn’t tweet mean things or fight with people or call real people names. Patchy does call TV characters names, though. Anyway… most of the times Patchy has been shadowbanned for 24 hours. Welp… this time, it’s been over 36 hours and Patchy is still shadowbanned.

One of Patchy’s friends searched for Patchy and Twitter told him there were no search results, but his settings may be preventing him from seeing potentially sensitive content. PATCHY TWEETS ARE NOT SENSITIVE CONTENT!!!!!!

Patchy has repeatedly asked Twitter to tell him why he keeps being shadowbanned. The only response Patchy gets is from an automated bot, telling Patchy to use Twitter’s help page to file a report.

Look, Patchy uses Twitter to live tweet TV shows with other fans of the show. THAT’S IT. Patchy isn’t a political troll. Patchy doesn’t call people names. Patchy doesn’t try to sell anybody anything. Patchy is just Patchy. Patchy exists to have fun on Twitter.

Here’s the deal. Patchy’s twitter account was first created because Patchy couldn’t leave the house. Patchy was sick. Patchy created a Twitter account to live tweet The Walking Dead. Patchy also created Patchette’s twitter account so Patchette could live tweet too. Patchy and Patchette had fun live tweeting all our favorite TV shows for a year and a half, until September of 2017, when Twitter shadowbanned Patchy right in the middle of one of the last episodes of Halt and Catch Fire.

Patchy’s friends tweeted support of Patchy and tagged Twitter in tweets asking them to restore Patchy’s account.

Patchy is not a bot. Patchy is not a troll. Patchy is not a predator. Patchy is not making money on Twitter. Patchy and Patchette live tweet to have fun. THAT IS ALL. And it’s not fun anymore.

Twitter’s management is the biggest bunch of cowards Patchy has ever seen. To spend nine months begging for a response and get no response is pathetic. Patchy doesn’t care if Twitter goes bankrupt. Patchy isn’t having fun anymore. Patchy is just sad.

Patchy and Patchette have met so many people we care about because of live tweeting TV shows. But Twitter doesn’t want Patchy anymore. Twitter has broken Patchy’s heart.

PACTCHY FORGOT THAT PATCHY HAS A BLOG… AGAIN!!!!!

It feels like Patchy has written this EXACT SAME BLOG POST before… Patchy keeps forgetting he has a blog. Patchy thought doing episode recaps would be fun and keep Patchy occupied and keep the blog going… but it is NOT WORKING OUT THAT WAY. Patchy is SORRY!!!!! Patchy will try to blog more though!!!!